This is kind of a view of my thoughts from the other day. It's very personal but I see God in my words and I see art and integrity. It's literally what was going through my mind. It was wanting out and I released it through the tips of my fingers. ~SQ~



I can finally think again. I heard God speak again. I’ve been set free by the one I wanted to be captured by. And it’s oh so bittersweet. The chains that have kept me in bondage have been released. I am free! Free to run, to dance, to live for You! Yet my heart feels like it’s been frayed at it’s corners. I felt like I had something good. Someone that You approved of. But I was deceived once again. I am angry. I am upset. I am sad. I am broken. I sound like a child…but I’m honest. I could have been happy. I could have been set. I AM SO MAD!!! Only You and I know the multiple amounts of emotions that have been flowing through my heart every minute of the last 24 hours. How much I am thankful for this honest response to my honest confession. How much I hate it at the same time! They gave me hope and encouragement with Your word yet it’s just that passion they have that caught my eye in the beginning. They passion they have for You. I almost want to go back in time and not even notice him. I wish he could have just been more honest and said “No, I’m not interested, sorry.” And walk away. But I know that You have a plan and a purpose in this and I’m trusting You even though I’m upset, sad, mad, angry, pissed, annoyed, happy, free, broken, weak, tired, and suffering miserably. I trust You. I will be still and know that You are God. That You are my hope, my joy, and my love. That You are here and Your Spirit dwells within me!!! I am not worthy but You thought so. Even when you knew that there was that possibility that I could have denied You and lived for myself until I would run my short life into the ground. Without You I honestly believe that I wouldn’t be here. I would be burning in the depths of hell and enduring a pain worst than this. But Lord I feel like I’m there now. I have been set free but I don’t know why You want me to move on from this. But I have hope. Hope and faith that You will bring me joy and love.



~alicia~